It has come to a point where i am ALMOST hating it

Pretty much the same old story goes. dance dance dance. no life. shucks man. Had nothing to do on a Friday nite cos wei wei fly me aeroplane (dun worry u are not the big fat disappointment)..... wah lao really shitty pls. when i had dance i can't go out. when there's no dance, no one wants to go out with me. FMFL. And then i SWORE on my own dead body that i wun ever go back for hall prod cos it is 110% always sucky. and they make u pay ridiculous amounts of money for lousy crap. budden since ct has free ticket and i had NOTHING TO DO aiyah. sometimes got to bend principles rt.....

And yes. althou the set and costumes and the songs were nice, the script pretty much sucked as usual. what kind of ending (or rather, non-ending) was that. Ridiculous pls..... went to FS with alexis and bide and bide got gay and knocked over his teh peng.... can u say butterfingers teeheehee (ok that's gay too. whoever uses teeheehee deserves to be shot)..... and then what did i do ah...... and then i went to meet haled at tp. i think i am going for my long vaca with him.... just dunno where to go yet.... SIAN. europe or US..... decisions decisions.... went home early cos next morning gotta go....

to the colombarium to visit my grandpaaaaaaa. Qing Ming Jie.... damn hot pls.... bloody hell the earth is going to explode i swear.... and i had to carry all the tables and shit. AIYAH sucks to be a guy. and then at nite a few of us scouty frens went to Victor's bachelor pad at Joo Chiat. WAH LAO i tell u..... his house is like FUCKING NICE PLS. like really really really really nice...... its an old walk up apartment which has one bedroom with his kingsized bed and a small balcony with a swinging chair (purfect for drinking and smoking. he smokes.) and like a super huge bathroom with mosaic tiles and ginormous basin and rain showers wtf. flat screen tv, gramophone, huge gigantic speakers for his iphone and he even has a bar with high stools and shitttttttttttttt OMG. i wanna shoot myself please.... how come my frens can afford apartments like that and i have like FUCK SHIT SAVINGS in my bank acct. wah kao. and he drives an alfa romeo by the way.

got myself kinda wasted over beer wine whisky and gin tonic.... played poker with the 3 unlikeliest people adam victor and xiong. i never really had anything in common with them when we were younger.... but it turned out pretty fun... maybe its the alcohol. yeah... i think it was. without alcohol i am NOTHING.

and then got to wake up for dance at 10. with a MAJOR headache. FML please. tsk i am almost on the verge of hating to go back for dance. as much as i liked it in the past.... i really dun think i can do this every year.... im like fuck shit tired after every prac that i cant do anything after that.... and my knees and ankles are sore i cant dance properly.... ARGH frustrating pls..... and i hate INCOMPETENT PEOPLE who dunno what the hell they are doing.... really wanna WASTE my time and think of steps on the spot right. bloody hell. sorry i had to say it. please dun waste my time. i have better things to do on a sunday. just saying.

so yeah. thats all...  i think i have turned into a cynical old bitch who gets pissed off easily. i must be having menopause.

YOU

are such a BIG FAT DISAPPOINTMENT.
.
.
.
and to think that i still care. FMFL.

A perfect way to end the nite...

8pm. Dinner of vegetable soup and steamed fish while watching amazing race. 2 huge dollops of haagen dazs macadamia nut brittle and rum raisin for desserts. diet can wait for another couple of days.

i havent done this in a long long time. the ice cream part. life is good :)

Shag daooo

Thank god next Friday got no dance. i swear dance on fridays is the ultimate potong steam thing cos.... it ends at 10pm. its too early to go home but u are already god damn shag. Thanks for having hall prod next Friday so i can GO OUT. (aint gonna go hall prod unless its totally freeeeee)

It was pouring like mad on Saturday. Like the clouds were having a 3months prolonged menses and all hell breaks lose..... but super shiok. slept till 10, woke up den went back to sleep again at 2. Didnt go to cheerobics this year... cos. no interested anymore. nobody i know is inside so.... aiyah no point. Went to meet Carol and Siwei at TGIFridays for dinner.... so coincidentally saw Vonn and Mabel who just had their lunch with the WAT people. hahah. TGIFridays was okkkk. not fantastic but alright i guess....

Went to red dot (again) cos i wanted to use up the voucher (and also cos i wanna save money).... and the funny thing was. MY TABLE WON BINGO AGAIN.... not me la but my fren but SERIOUSLY this is getting freaky cos anyone who is with me will surely win. no shit. Carol asked her super hot german colleague to join us. She's our age but came to Singapore to work with her bf.... and they stay at The Sail (expats shud just die).... got really boring so i zao to go find alexis.....

Bought maggi goreng and chicken wings and beer and hid at out fav hideout spot and whack supper and beer. and then realised that shit man i shud just stayover in hall cos its already 1245am and i dun wanna waste money taking cab home... then come back hall at 9am again for dance. Plus the Chuan Drive bitch also dun have car... zero incentive to go home. so...... I STAYED OVER. super spontaneous pls..... so proud of myself because i seldom do spontaneous things. I am anal that way..... And i am thankful for my frens who allow me to stay in their room as and when i want...... so THANKS HENRY!!! I bathed before sleeping so i didnt dirty ur bed. hahahhaa.

And then before i slept i told the bitch "i think i cant sleep tonite, even thou i am god damn tired. cos its not my bed...... i will probably wake up damn early and eat breakfast"
Then the bitch said "den can u help me buy breakfast plsssss. help me buy porridge.... and if u pass by fruits stall buy fruits for me too okkkkk"
"u think i am ur maid issit?"
"no..... but u are my father. my father always buy breakfast and fruits for me one *watery puppy eyes"
JIBAI. emotional blackmail at its finest. really wanna target my weakest spot (paternal instincts) right...... but props to u cos it worked.

I really CANNOT sleep on hall bed anymore cos its god damn horrible to sleep on. no wonder i had countless sleepless nites when i was still in hall. Shit man dunno if i shud sleep in hall during DU.... or shud i go home..... rolled and flipped ard until i finally finally went to sleep at like 4plus..... woke up at 830am.... and really went to buy breakfast. Like an uncle..... geez.

After almost 4 hours of dance and then preview.... super shagged out. The bitches thinks that i have a mini me in dance which is SO NOT TRUE pls.... how can u even compare me to him. Really never die before rt..... But i gotta say.... this year's DU standard is SO HORRIBLE i am actually thinking twice about asking my colleagues to come watch. later they say i waste their time..... tsk tsk tsk. vetting should totally come back with a vengeance.....

On the way home in cab, me and step were bitching bitching halfway about dance but we were so shagged there was a sudden silence den we concussed all the way until the uncle waked us up..... totally cannot make it pls.... ok so yeah thats all... my spontaneous weekend. gotta love it.

Another bout of spiralling outta control

I am scaring myself.... binge drinking and eating and taking leave just to sleep at home. Totally not proud of it. But i could use a lil break.... with all the crap i am putting out at work. I think it's better this way. Yes?

am i a wild horse that's not meant to be reined?
or am i waiting to be set free?

leaking like MAD

No i am not having period. netiher am i having running nose.... i am talking about my bank account!!! omg i dunno what the hell i have been doing with my money it is draining out like mad man..... i used up all my red packet money, i just received my credit card bill and that was not including the bloody high cut shoes and m denim shirt and now i got to pay for the Rawa trip deposit.... not only mine but alexis's as well.... (ok not her fault i promised to pay first) but still, i am going for dental appt on wed, i just went to see doctor for my stupid eye..... i am semi freaking out right now. totally low on cash. june couldnt come any faster cos i SERIOUSLY need my bonus right abt now.

other than that..... I am totally screwing up the easiest task at work and i am really really very upset with myself. i cant believe i can make such idiotic mathematical mistakes..... and esp at this time of the year when you get judged for the preformance of your work. u kinda wanna leave a good last impression before u get "graded". fuck this shit man.

:)))))

So this week was pretty fun. Besides Friday night, I actually had things to do… Congwei and some of us decided to buy a portable beach volleyball court to use and we finally de-virginised it on Saturday. We were supposed to reach at 10. Then it changed to 12pm…. And everyone only came at like 2pm. Damn those hall idiots.

It was raining quite badly at 1 plus but out of a sudden it became all sunny and bright. Totally can get chao da kind of sun…. we took super long to assemble the court cause we were all noobs and it turned out to be a pretty decent court!! I think there was some Russian fleet week cause there were a lot of eastern European sailors walking around Sentosa…. Some wanted to join us but we were bastards so we said No. hahah.

Lost track of time and luckily it started to rain again, otherwise we wouldn’t have stopped. Had to wait for the monorail at 5pm can u believe it…. Must be the bloody resorts world crowd. Chionged back home to bathe and prepare myself for the long-awaited 8gz 7gz dinner!!!

We went to Spruce!!

2nd time there (hafiz stop trying to close down that place… let them make money) and it was just as good!! I’m glad they liked their food… esp the Ahi Tuna Tartar…. Seriously rocks like anything… and the bread. WOOOOHOOO!!

A much failed photo we tried to take while leaving the place… blame it on condensation  we didn’t get any nice photos that nite with the 7 of us. So sad.

Camwhoring in Cloudy.... sadly i have zero nice photos from the nite.... i either had a very big head (like the red queen), very little hair, or trip chin.... FML

After that we proceeded to Red Dot…. Fav hangout place…. We swore not to go back there but we ended up at that place anyway. We were just in time to play BINGO!!! We always won when we went and TRUE ENOUGH, 5minutes into the game...

yours truly struck gold!!! Told ya I had luck….. looks like we have to go back there after DU again!!! :))

We had a lot of fun, talking and gossiping, talking about menses, rawa and bitching in general. And of cos all the camwhoring whilst getting semi-tipsy

With my.... erm. bitch...

and the young'uns

Went to meet Khalid, Haikel and Irfan afterwards to club. Quite awful cos there were 1million people and the music was quite sucky. Was rather tired too so I went home at 2am.

Didn’t do anything much today… except celebrate my grandma’s 80th birthday at Crystal Jade Palace at Taka!!! WOOHOOO damn shiok please… we polished off 4 bottles of fine with crab roe shark’s fin, peking duck, plus loads of other goodies…. Diet be gone!!


Yeap. Indeed a very happy weekend…. Finally I had something fun to do… anyway, if u were wondering what the hell i was doing with a denim shirt...

well..... i tot i could pull this off......

can i say.... EPIC SUCCESS..... hhahahahahahahaa kidding la freak. but ok la 1/4 way there..... the things i do for fashion. Aye.... i dun get it.... i always think i look ok in mirror before i leave house but when i take photos i always look like shit. if i smile i look like i am a squirrel storing nuts in my cheeks.... but if i dun smile i look like shit. HOW U TELL ME. FML. maybe i really need to use some face slimming cream... and soak my head in brandy everynite. :(((((

Always have a plan B

So as some of u may know i was tasked to organise a company retreat.... which was why i went to Treetop walk to recee 2 weeks back.... today was supposed to be the day we went...... and IT RAINED of ALL DAYS......

i was lying on my bed.... my stomach was aching so i was awake. den i heard the familiar pittapatter of RAIN. fuck. i looked at my clock... it was 730am. the bus was supposed to pick up my colleagues from office at 845am and i was supposed to meet them there directly.... so i was hoping it would stop raining soon.... 745.... 755.... i could take it anymore. the rain doesnt seem to be subsiding... FML... i was lying on my bed thinking of a plan b. Problem was i DIDNT have a plan b because i tot the weather these 2 weeks was so UNBELIEVABLY hot and dry it cant POSSIBLY rain today..... so i was like fuck fuck fuck i am so screwed i need to find something to do for 3 hours in the morning.....

so i tot and tot whilst smsing all my colleagues to "just get on the bus. i will think of something".... fuck. panicking like hell pls..... i switched on my comp at 8....and came up with the WONDERFUL idea of watching movie... gotta love that... and then i scrolled and scrolled and finally i found out that AMK hub was playing Alice in Wonderland at 1030am. PERFECT. so i smsed everyone "get your ass to AMK hub we are watching movie"..... i am so clever..... just before we were about to go into the cinema.... the rained stop and the sun was shining so brightly... geez thanks god. what a way to fuck with me...... L

Good thing was no one watches movie at 1030am on a wednesday so the theatre was empty as hell. the lucky thing was none of my colleagues have watched the movie yet (except me) but u know..... gotta sacrifice for the greater good.... im just too nice. Here's a song i really love from the movie



went to Rice Table buffet @Orchard to whack some indon food for lunch.... very nice for $17.88 nett!!!! and 15% discount for stand chart credit card.... wooohoo!! den we took the coach back to AMK to do charity work at some elderly day care centre!

We were supposed to like make drinks for them and make bread.... the charity home person was like SO WHO WANTS TO MAKE THE DRINKS.... no one stepped up so I DID. *pats back. they have the really authentic cloth sieve and everything.... and everyone was like flooding me with orders.... 2 KOPI 4 KOPI OH SIEWW DAIIII.... 5 TEHHHHH please i was like hello hello chill pls i am doing this for the first time.... now i wun blame the coffeeshop uncle for forgetting our orders anymore.... its not easy pls...

i was really surprised that the day care centre was located at a hdb flat, like the first 3 stories were all for this purpose.... really very intrigued.... learnt that actually some of the ah mahs and ah peks met there and got married.... so sweet right. den one guy who was living alone in the upper floors died for one week and no one knew.... and i was think "fuck thats going to be me in 50 years time. i will die and no one will know"...... aiyah. so sad. scouting for my future home... it was quite nice but sad at the same time cos i REALLY DUN WANNA END UP THERE NEXT TIME.

So yeah.... thats about it.... moral of the story is..... ALWAYS HAVE A PLAN B. the rain will just fuck u up when u least expect it.

I feel like screaming at the top of my lungs...

But i think it's better for me to shut up.... nothing good's ever gonna come outta it.

on an unrelated note, hopefully everything will work out fine come june :) crossing my fingers.

Everybody's fine

I expected to watch an indie comedy on a Sunday nite, chill out... relax a lil. But it turned out to be a totally depressing movie...



Not to say i didnt like it.... it has it's own poignant moments... no climax but it just draws u in. and the last part, BAM... almost made me cry. so if u have the time u can go to here to watch free online versions of the movie (which are in very good quality). Make me want to have kids man....

so damn bloody hot

wah shit man i just went to take a shower expecting cold water and it totally felt like i had the heater on.... Fuck.

Anyway my fridays are getting more boring as the weeks go by..... totally nothing to do please.... except dance. no one wants to go out everyone wants to stay in. WHAT IS THIS. Went to celebrate JP's bday at Minds.... was supposed to reach at 730pm but step was late (as usual) to pick me up and somehow there was a massive jam at upper srgn road.... sian. so we only got there at 810pm. Felt damn bad cos i got to go meet water to watch movie 1 1/2 hours later...... but we had fun while it lasteddddddd...... played some new zombie games which was quite fun.... and the cheesy fish and chips still rocks....

So i met a very depressed water to go watch Alice in Wonderland.... and i asked him "why u so emo. issit because aili is not around"...... "no.... cos i met my jc classmate and he said i was fat.... and he gave a very shocked face"..... hahaha gotta love that. i am not the only guy obsessed about my weighttttt. Alice in Wonderland was alright i guess.... was pretty funny at some parts.... esp the Red Queen and the twins.... LOL please. But overall i thot it was pretty boring for a Tim Burton movie..... Even Sweeny Todd was better. Perhaps they are also cashing in on the 3D movie hype cos it would have been quite nice in 3D but it was already sold out so watever.... Went to eat supper at maxwell and whacked 2 plates of orh luah.... and then i turned to water and said "you realise this is why u are fat right?" uh huh... gotta tell it like is....

Went out to shop just now. SUPER HOT la wah lao.... went to scout for high cut shoes and in the end ended up with a 189bucks (shuddap i know its ex) adidas shoes.... which look damn nice but it somehow looks weird when i wear it. SIAN. but dun care la.... i wanted a pair since forever and i was feeling (faux) rich so just whack la right.... so ta da here u go.... my high cut shoes (which in fact isnt very high cut anyways)

Sorry for the flaring nostrils.... u bitches better say its nice... if not i will slap u.... den den den i suddenly remembered looking at Style : MEN and recalled that denim stuff are super in this season so i went round scouting for denim-looking shirts.... saw one at GAP budden wanted to see if my fav Zara had a similar one too.... AND THEY DID.... so happy pls. my 101th zara top... i didnt even think what i can match it with but heck la i just needed to get one.... wah lao. 2 impulse buys in a day. FML. i think i shud wear my shoes till holes appear in the soles....

ok...... very hot very hot. cannot take it.... gonna take a shower now. BYE.

Imma rude boy. DEAL WITH IT.

So i was just minding my own business today... almost 6pm and i was rushing like mad to finish some work for my boss. I was supposed to leave work at 6pm to meet the rest for MQ's bday.... den this bloody tele-marketeer had to call and PISS ME OFF. She sounded like a early 40s loser auntie....

"errr hello is this Mr Tan Cheong Chye"

anyone who starts off like this is obviously either an insurance salesperson, from California Gym or some random bo liao person who wants to promote some shitty ass product that doesnt work

"er ya. how can i help you?"
"I am calling from XXX company.... dun worry.... *static static... i am not selling u anything... just wanted to let you know that you have been selected by my company for a free makeover..."

FUCK MAN really wanna tell me i need a make-over right.... JIBAI.

"sorry not interested. Bye"..... den i went back to rush for my work la.... not 10 secs later i saw the same number ring.... i just left it alone.... den as i was taking the lift up to my my aceo it rang again..... den of cos i sibei dulan already right.... DUN U KNOW HOW TO TAKE A HINT.... i hung up my phone. twice.... left my paper on my boss's desk and took the lift down back to my office.... den it rang again.... fuck man. needy clingy turns me off if you dun already know.... esp when i am rushing for time and have NO TIME TO ENTERTAIN U.

So i was really pissed off and i asnwer my phone and said "Yes? What do u want?"

"eh i havent even said anything why you hang up my phone?"

"err ya i already said i am not interested"

"but i havent even said anything how do you know you are not interested? It's VERY rude to just hang up the phone like that you know.... do you know you it's very RUDE?" She sounded really pissed.... but trust me i was even piss-er

"yeah i know i am very rude. anything else? No right? Ok bye"

BITCH MAN YOU REALLY WANNA CALL ME BACK AND BITCH TO ME. u have NO IDEA WHO U ARE MESSING WITH. If i had the time to bitch u back, and if my colleague is not with me in the lift, this is what i would have said

1. First of all, i am the customer and i am NOT OBLIGED in anyway to listen to you crap
2. 2nd of all, you are a fucking low-lifer who promotes things on the phone so kindly fuck off and leave me alone. i have better things to do.
3. 3rdly, you obviously sound like a person who needs a fucking makeover MORE THAN I DO BITCH.
4. and who are u to tell me i am RUDE when u keep calling like i am your boyfriend u fucking loser.
5. AND YES I AM RUDE. FUCKING DEAL WITH IT. THIS IS YOUR JOB.

U better not catch me at a wrong time if not i will screw up UPSIDE DOWN AND INSIDE OUT. Tele-marketers, together with credit card promoters at MRTs and insurance agents should seriously just go to hell.

Sometimes...

Sometimes i like to pick a fight for no reason... just because i haven't quarrel with someone for very long

Sometimes i like to stay up very late, even thou i am super tired... just because i'd rather not waste my time sleeping

Sometimes i wear the ugliest combi of clothes to work... just because i feel like looking like shit

Sometimes i make up stories in my head.... because it's easier to explain things which i dun understand

Sometimes i treat u like shit... just cause i think it is an easier way out

Sometimes i get very bitchy after work... because i can't act that way during 9 to 5 and all that pent up frustration gets the better of me

Sometimes i do self destructive things... because most self destructive things feels oh so good when u are doing it

Sometimes i feel like the sanest person on earth.... when in fact i am slowly going crazy

Sometimes.... sometimes..... sometimes....

[Untitled]

"There's a lot to be said for self-delusionment when it comes to matters of the heart."

how true.